Designing your life around Aliveness: Unstructured Time and True Success

Success is not created through grinding it out and hustling harder, but by following and cultivating aliveness.

There, I said it.

Contrary to popular opinion…

The path to your most impactful work and soul-nourishing life is paved with unstructured time.

I know this sounds too good to be true, but stick with me.

I’m going to challenge everything you've been taught about success and productivity.

~ In this article ~

  • The Problem: The High Performance Trap

  • The Solution: Designing Around Aliveness

  • The Power of Unstructured Time

  • Practical Steps: Crafting Your Alive, Successful Life

  • Your Invitation to Outrageous Success and a Softer Life

The Problem: The High Performance Trap

As ambitious visionary women, we've been sold a lie.

We've been told that success comes from:

  • Constant hustle and grind

  • Sacrificing our personal lives for professional achievement

  • Giving everything we’ve got to the cause …

  • Pushing through exhaustion and ignoring our body's signals.

If this sounds familiar ….

You might be caught in what I call the High Performance Trap.

It's a cycle of overworking, burning out, and then fearing slipping back into burnout so much that you hold yourself back from your desires and full potential.

The Solution: Designing Your Life Around Aliveness

I advocate that instead of designing our lives around productivity and hustle, we designed them around aliveness and unstructured time.

Wild. I know!!

Aliveness is that feeling of being fully present, energised, and connected to yourself and the world around you. It's the opposite of the drained, robotic state we often find ourselves in when we’ve been pushing too hard for too long or when we’re stuck in freeze - afraid of burning out again.

When we design our lives around aliveness:

  1. We tap into our deepest creativity and intuition

  2. We make decisions from a place of clarity, not overwhelm

  3. We show up as our fullest, most authentic selves in our work and relationships

  4. We create impact not through force, but through authenticity and alignment.

The Power of Unstructured Time

Now, you might be thinking, "Sounds great, but how do I actually do this, rediscover my aliveness and all?"

The secret weapon is unstructured time.

Unstructured time is the space in your life that isn't scheduled or allocated to specific tasks.

It's time for daydreaming, exploring, resting, or simply being.

I heard this state of being referred to as ‘Wild Idling’.

And I totally love it.

Because it is wild.

Wild in terms of feral, undomesticated, uncontrolled.

The ‘wild edge of idling’ could lead us anywhere.

And counterintuitive as it may seem, it's the key to both aliveness and outrageous success.

Here's why:

  • Unstructured time allows your mind to make new connections, leading to innovative ideas

  • It gives you space to tune into your body and emotions, preventing burnout

  • It gives you space to reconnect to pleasure, and primary satisfactions (the things that really fill you up, give you meaning and resource you)

  • It creates room for serendipity and unexpected opportunities

  • It replenishes your energy, allowing you to show up fully to your art, your connections, your work

  • It gives your imagination room to wander, to dream, to question, to roam outside its usual confines…

This is why it’s wild and dangerous, and suppressed by our ‘productivity, busy-as-a-badge-of-honour, 24/7’ culture, because it might lead to actual change.

A woman with wild idling time might start to feel things, question things, refuse things. She might restore her energy, reignite her passion, find her confidence and start a personal (or massive) revolution … best to keep her too busy instead!!

Practical Steps: Crafting Your Alive, Successful Life

If you want to start designing your life around aliveness.

Here are some steps to begin:

  1. Audit your current schedule: Where are you overcommitted? Where can you create pockets of unstructured time?

  2. Identify your aliveness activities: What makes you feel most alive? Reading, walking in nature, creative pursuits? Schedule these in.

  3. Practice saying no: Every time you say no to something that doesn't align with your aliveness, you're saying yes to yourself.

  4. Redefine success: What does success look like when it includes how alive you feel, not just what you achieve?

  5. Start small: Even 15 minutes of unstructured time a day can make a difference. Build from there.

  6. Join Rest & Receive! It’s seriously good!

Your Invitation to Outrageous Success and a Softer Life

The High Performance Trap is BS, it’s time to step into a new paradigm of success – one that honours your aliveness and gives you the unstructured time you crave.

This isn't about lowering your ambitions. It's about achieving them in a way that feels good, sustainable, and true to who you are.

It's about having both: a softer, more alive life AND outrageously impactful success.

Your Assignment:

This week, schedule some completely unstructured time. Notice how it feels, what comes up for you, and how it impacts the rest of your day.

I'd love to hear your reflections. How does the idea of designing your life around aliveness resonate with you? What changes do you notice when you prioritise unstructured time?

Remember, you don't have to choose between being successful and being alive. In fact, true, outrageous success arises from a foundation of your embodied aliveness.

How I can help you embody this approach:

"Rest and Receive" - a cozy six-week winter container for ambitious women who've worked hard all year and are longing to reconnect with what truly matters for 2025.

Through guided weekly practice and live 'wild idling' sessions, we'll create sacred space for you to exhale, process, contemplate, and access your deepest wisdom. No performance metrics, no optimization - just pure, nourishing restoration.

Experience a more relaxed festive season, and start 2025 replenished and reconnected.

Live sessions begin December 11th 2024, Tuesdays 5:30-7:00pm UK time.

All sessions: December: 11th & 18th, January: 8th, 15th & 22nd

→ Learn more about Rest and Receive

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Rediscovering Balance: Embodiment as the Path to a Life Well-Lived

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The Myth of 'There': How Future-Living Steals Our Peace and Power.